A Dose of Fail

-_- So....Let me recap this week quickly. I've been sick. Went to the ER and was diagnosed with having a BAD virus running rampant in my body. The doctor gave me five different medications, all of which require being taken multiple times a day, spaced out properly to avoid overdose and to keep the medicine in me constantly. This means....sleep even though the drugs are making me tired! Tap in with James and I being at each others throats almost every day. This came to a head last night. We were screaming so much (Well, he was screaming, I was squeaking...I still sound like a chipmunk, but my voice is finally coming back) that one of our neighbors came over to see if she could help us out (she's super motherly), and the other ended up calling Security Forces. Mind you, SF never actually came to our house; They sat in their car across from our house, listening and watching. Thankfully, we gave them no reason to intervene.

The worst parts of this? A) My 4 month old marriage is already suffering and B) We were not mindful of our neighbors who both have small children. Now I feel like a rude putz.

Well, that basically sums this up. I suppose I should stop procrastinating (though I do it so very well) and take care of the neglected house work (I didn't realize how messy this house would get within just a few days) since my husband won't help me/do it himself. It's 9:34 AM and I haven't been to bed yet.....=\

[breathe] Just a few more days until I go back to NC for Christmas. The first thing I am going to do is go HOME and hug my sweet dog who's been pining for me.

Super Sad

It's just not been my week. I went from being super angry yesterday to super sad today.

See, I try not to call home a  lot, because it makes me really homesick...I've only been gone for a few months, and my logic is that if I go longer and longer without interaction, the pain will lessen. Today, though,  I was super excited about the fact that I'd found the perfect Christmas gift for my Mama.  So I sent her a text, telling her I got her a gift and she messages me back, asking why. I told her it's because she's my mama and I love her, and she responded with "I wasn't a very good one..." which is the truth, really, but I still love her none the less. Well, not knowing how to respond to her comment, I simply left the conversation off until I could get home and call her. Before I had the chance, though, she messaged me again saying "Did your grandmother tell her I had to have Baby (her 11 year old cat) put to sleep? I can't stand walking into the house anymore because he's not there...". Ya'll, this cat use to sit on the kitchen table in my moms house and say "Hello" when he heard her at the door and then "Mama" when he saw her.  I've heard him do it.  Her other cat is confused and at a loss; he doesn't know what to do without his buddy.  The worst part is the fact that my mom IS so upset and I'm too far away to do anything that could possibly help  her feel better. When I got home, I curled up on the couch and started crying; my husband ended up pulling me into his lap and just let me lay there and bawl my eyes out. I feel like CRAP and I want to go back to North Carolina so very badly right now. 

Of course, it doesn't help that tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and this is the first major holiday that I have spent away from home. =(  My heart has a really big super sad right now.